Pardon my blush.

I heart cosmetics so every morning I put on generous amounts of Pixi for Target’s Pick-me-up Blush–but do I need it? NO! because I seem to be going through a phase where I am constantly blushing.

Kinda expensive but soooo soft, glittery and pretty!

Like seriously, CONSTANTLY BLUSHING! I am blushing right now just thinking about blushing. Most often I blush at the Reference Desk–I think it most often happens when A. I am struggling to help a person and embarrassed or anxious about it or B. when I switch from my professional-Reference-Librarian face to Amber-the-nerdgirl face. This happens whenever one of my girlfriends stops in and I wasn’t expecting them (omigosh, Chelsea surprised me once and I squeeled “CHELSEA!” and then proceeded to blush for the next hour…)

aaaaaaand it also happens often whenever a guy looks at me. I know! Horrible! I am sooo not used to guys looking at me so now that I am in a job where they have to look at me in order to ask questions, and it shows ON MY FACE. Sometimes I start blushing even before they make it to the desk because I know that the looking is coming. gAHHH am I cliche mousy librarian or what?!

So what do you do when you blush? I think first a look of fear flashes across my face, then my eyes get very darty, and I start talking faster, then I try to act like I’m just really warm at the moment and nonchalently fan myself, and I try to answer the question super fast but then my mind goes blank so I busy myself somewhere where my back can be turned to them (such as at the printer or sharply towards the computer monitor) and continue to babble at them and finally they get their information and go on their way.

BUT WHAT ARE THEY THINKING? they have to notice, right? Although, I don’t think I’ve ever noticed someone blushing while talking to them…but maybe I’ve never made anyone blush 🙂 I’ll just hope it makes me look romantic and sweet, and not creepy awkward…hmmm, but romantic and sweet isn’t exactly how I want to look at the public library (although it is how I would want a chick lit book about a public librarian like me to look).

While looking for a blushing pic for this post (couldn’t find any–all were just pictures of “blushing brides” none of which who were actually blushing…) I found this:

caption here

Huh. So reading the info on this actually made me feel worse about blushing (because to be honest, I didn’t really feel that bad about it)–it’s all: “Blushing is totally ruining your life,” and “you would be a better person if you didn’t blush” etc etc (totally paraphrased). Not going to buy because hypnotism totally scares me. There’s gotta be some sort of aromatherapy or massage treatment.

amber (my face is so hot right now from all the blushing)


2 Responses to “Pardon my blush.”

  1. 1 ngtjennifer April 15, 2010 at 10:34 pm

    I totally blush all the time too at the desk!! It happens for no apparent reason and way too often. I also have a problem looking people in the eye. I find I am always looking at their tummies because that is about the level I am at while sitting at the desk. I have to force myself to look at someone’s face.

  2. 2 octopuscircus November 12, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    I am also a public librarian and I blush so much, for many of the same reasons as you. It is really embarrassing because I am supposed to be a friendly Circ librarian. I blushed a little in college, but not nearly as much as I do now. I am not used to guys looking at me either, even only to get information like the name of a book. I heard there are pills you can take to restrict the blood flow in your face, but that seems dangerous. I just want a simple trick. I read that the less you worry about it the less you actually blush. I am trying that now, or trying to think of other things as I help out an attractive male patron. I don’t want to look like I care about cute guys! I just want to do my job!

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