Super Useful Amber Tips

1. Guitar Picks make the best pill splitters.

Me holding a guitar pick

Me holding a guitar pick

Seems I have been taking a lot of pills lately in abnormal doses because I have been doing some frequent pill splitting. First I tried the suggested knife which always seemed to explode the pill into a million fragments, so then I switched to a metal hairpiece which worked ok, but then I picked up a random guitar pick and I have never turned back–splits it perfect everytime! Oh, and I kinda realize that the whole using-guitar-pick-to-spit-pills image seems kinda of rock scene drug queen, so let me just say to you lovely readers: Take only doctor-prescribed drugs and take them responsibly! I’m so anti-drug drugs, except for marijuana which I think is disgusting, but I think others should be able to smoke it if they wish. I mean some people probably think cowtails are disgusting, whereas I think they are the most delicious candy ever! and I would hate for cowtails to be illegal.

2. When you find yourself without your cuticle cream, your chapstick will work just fine!

chapstick = cuticle cream

chapstick = cuticle cream

Just rub some chapstick onto your finger and work it into your chapped cuticles–they will look flawless in no time! chapstick is also great to relieve chapped noses when you have a cold.

3. Use a strand of hair for emergency floss.

me with my teeth and glasses

me with my teeth and glasses

yes I know it sounds gross, but it works! Just pluck out a piece of hair and carefully floss–carefully because hair breaks easier than floss so sometimes you have to use more than one piece. And if you are like “ew that is dead skin, I don’t want that in my teeth” um, I ask do you ever use your fingernails to get stuff out of your teeth? I hope you said yes to that question because otherwise I will feel like a really disgusting person. I used this tip alot back in high school cheerleading before varsity games when I would sit and eat popcorn while stretching. Yum, I love concession stand food. OOOh, if you are ever at the Burlington Stadium–fyi they make the BEST walking tacos. You all know how much I love my walking tacos.

and that has been some handy tips from Amber that she collected while avoiding writing a very long final paper…

amberj.

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